Chicago, IL — Despite constant updates on various social media accounts, friends of local comedian Morton Gondley were reportedly unsure of when and where his next performance would be.
“I put my Venmo, Cash App and my PayPal address on the flyer,” said Gondley, while obsessively refreshing his Facebook app. “This show is the only thing I have posted about for the last five weeks. I also used the phrase ‘seating is limited’ even though it’s a Zoom show. And the same people reacting to the poster are the ones asking me when my next show is! This is insane!”
Comedian Leeta Shremenie has a similar problem to Gondley’s; her friends ask when her next show is while catching up, only to offer mixed reactions.
“I told one of my friends, ‘Oh, I have one tonight. And it’s online so you don’t have to go anywhere.’ She told me she couldn’t because she had to watch The Crown. I reminded her it’s available to stream any time, but she told me ‘I don’t think mine works like that. I really need to call Netflix.’ I called for her and they laughed at me like I was an idiot.”
Studies from the Mediocre Entertainment department at University of Chicago have shown that the majority of adults find it easier to falsely say they are going to attend a comedy show than explain why they can’t.
“It’s a medical phenomenon known as OYMDGSTNS, which stands for ‘Oh Yeah, My Dog Got Sick That Night Syndrome,’” explained social scientist Boz Dune, “It’s a remarkable paradox in which the longer you do something, the more your friends forget that you even do it. In fact, there is recent data that the most popular local comedians are often people who haven’t performed in years.”
It was determined that Gondley was unavailable for further comment when nobody felt like checking to see if his Facebook had any contact information.
By Chris Hudson.
The Bringer 